Hi, my name is Jasmine— Mama to Wolf.
We are currently going through the worst season of our lives right now.
On Monday August 29, I had to fly down with my son to Miami and say goodbye.
After a judge said that Wolf’s biological father would have custody over Wolf and I was given visitation rights for few holidays. (Thanksgiving, Mother’s Day, and 5 weeks during the summer)
Why did this happen?
If you haven’t seen a few videos posted on the matter over on my TikTok (@smallandfragileclub) you can do so for more details, but I had to leave the jurisdiction while the custody case was still pending.
For those who don’t know, you can’t leave the jurisdiction without Judge approval. We were unable to continue living in the apartment we (my mom, myself and wolf) were living at because we received a 53% rent increase and could not afford it anymore. We could not find a suitable place to rent and eventually found a rental in Tallahassee.
This was the only thing they held against me.
They did not care that I was the only one providing for Wolf. They did not care that I found Wolf a safe place to live. They did not care about anything that I did for Wolf. And they definitely did not care that Wolf is still breastfed.
If I do move back to South Florida I would be granted 50/50.
So why don’t I move back immediately?
Well there’s a few reasons.
1. Before we relocated we did actively search for an apartment to move into while the case settles, but we couldn’t find an affordable home to rent.
2. I have called and emailed a plethora of places throughout Miami-Dade and Broward county searching for an apartment and I was flooded with similar responses “over 1 year waitlist” “nothing available” “waiting list has closed due to too many applicants”— the housing crisis in South Florida is real, I’ve experienced it. Emails received were submitted to the court to show proof, but they dismissed my efforts.
3. I truly couldn’t afford to relocate once again. If I could afford to move I could afford a lawyer and I wouldn’t be here asking to aid.
4. No victim of domestic abuse should have to conform to their abuser. Telling me I have to find a way to live close to my abuser is haunting.
5. I found a safe, affordable, comfortable, home here in Tallahassee for my family. Wolf has made his first friend here (and their birthdays are 2 days apart!!!). Although we’ve been here for a few months it’s truly a safe haven for us all. To know I won’t see my abuser randomly in the street, it soothes my soul.
And I know what some people might think, ‘fathers deserve the right to see their children as well’ and I absolutely agree.
Good fathers deserve their children just as much as good mothers. But not someone who was psychologically abusive towards the mother of their child while they were pregnant, not someone who did not respect their child during infancy and gave the bare minimum, not someone who is using their child as a financial benefit for themselves, not someone who repeated many times that he didn’t want this child before he was even born, and definitely not someone who is okay with taking away a breastfed child from their caregiver and ignoring the psychological damage that the child is enduring.
Post separation abuse is real. Abusers will continue to torment their ex partner even after they’ve separated all because they want to continue being in control.
I’m allowed one FaceTime call everyday to talk to Wolf and for a week now every single time he sees my face he immediately starts crying and calling out for me. When it’s time to say bye the tears will continue. He’ll kiss the phone bye while crying. Sometimes I can’t even see him past a whole minute because he is so distraught that I can’t continue the call.
Young kids do not understand what a custody case is. They don’t understand the system. They don’t understand why they’ve been taken from their home and now are in a new environment away from everything that brings them comfort and safety. Infants and toddlers comprehend abandonment.
The Lord has kept me strong during this difficult time, but when I think about Wolfs heart and emotions and mental health, that’s when I fall apart.
I tried to advocate for my son alone and represent myself in court but either the judge was bought out or she is just so heartless to insult me as a mother, dismiss my concerns, and fall for the narcissist, con artist, that my ex is.
The judge, GAL, ONLY focused on my ex, instead of focusing on Wolf’s well-being.
I was even muted (LITERALLY) when I mentioned Wolf’s emotional and mental well being.
I’ve found a lawyer who deals with post-separation abuse, and narcissists and she has reassured me that she can get Wolf home.
She comes with a hefty price tag, as usual lawyers do. But I cannot fight this alone. I lack the legal knowledge to do so.
I’ve been a stay at home mama since Wolf was born and I dedicated everything to him. I even started a small business that allowed me to provide financially— I recently closed due to price increase from my supplier so I couldn’t maintain it. As a content creator I work with companies here and there but it all goes to bills. I’m grateful to do what I do, and what I have done for my son.
All funds collected will go immediately to the aforementioned lawyer.
If you cannot donate, trust me I understand, but all I ask is 2 things from you. Please share this with anyone you know, and also keep Wolf in your prayers. To keep him strong during our time apart.
Thank you immensely.
May God bless you for your time, contributions, and love towards my son and I.